Stop Being Scared of Change
I’ve never been afraid of change. When I was 13, my parents called me into the living room and said: “How do you feel about moving to and living in London?”. I didn’t need to think about it for long “ YES, REALLY?! OMG, YES!” I’m pretty sure was my response. Nevermind about the friends I had, the school I was at the time – even though I loved it all and I wasn’t an unhappy child. My parents made sure I always had what I needed and I never would’ve known we were struggling at the time if they haven’t explicitly told me. Nevertheless, when they asked me, in all seriousness if I want to move to a completely new country, with a different language (which I only learnt in school with no practical experience) and new people – none of it scared me. Instead – I was super excited and couldn’t wait ‘til summer (I had to finish school first) to move to London. The change didn’t scare me, I was too excited to be scared.
My first day of school in England – many children, and those who were born here, are terrified of a first day at a new school. Having to make new friends, stepping into a completely new environment to learn new things – it can all be quite daunting for children. Not me. I couldn’t wait to go into the school and meet everyone, meet the people that some of which are still my friends today. My parents were more worried for me. I was over the moon. I came back with a massive smile on my face and my parents couldn’t believe that a child can be so excited to go to school.
Every day was a new challenge and a completely new experience. From my first full conversation in English, with this quiet girl at school (safe option – she didn’t seem like she’d laugh at me if I said something wrong) to then two years later, resolving my friends’ dramas and saving friendships. I loved the school itself too, and the things I was learning – I found it interesting and much better than what education is like in Poland.
I’ve always changed my mind frequently and abruptly. And I’ve always followed my gut. Whether it is going after a job, choosing a partner or a place to live – I’ve always followed my own intuition. It’s never failed me yet. By doing that, I’ve always ended up in the place I wanted to be, with who I wanted to be, doing what I wanted to do. Sometimes, after a while that place/person/thing wouldn’t be enough so I’d change things up a bit and face a new challenge, meet a new person, teach myself a new thing.
I’ve been criticised before for my ever-changing mind. For my quick decisions and ‘no-regrets’ attitude. Usually, only criticised by people who have never taken a chance, never have done something in a spur of a moment and never faced a new, unexpected challenge. I am not saying everyone should be jumping between options like I do, make spontaneous decisions and never settle. But people my age? The millennials? 20 – 30somethings? Why not use the best 10 years of our lives to do everything we possibly can and YES, take challenges and YES, invite change into your life.
It does not have to be anything super dramatic or involving a lot of money or anything that great. Small every day decisions, little challenges like teaching yourself something new – a language? How to knit or play guitar? Unless you constantly educate yourself, experience new things – you will never learn and you will never grow. Because how can you, when there is nothing there to stimulate you thinking a little different to what you are used to? You don’t want to stay put in your ways, within your comfort zone all the time. Yes, it is good to find your comfort zone but sometimes, you can step out of it and try something new.
My love for all things new and desire for new challenges and changes in my life, have not only led me to some of the most amazing people in my life but also opened up a lot of doors for opportunity. Trying out things and taking on new challenges doesn’t necessarily mean you will grow within your path, either. I have taken on a new challenge of this new job I started 4 months ago. Now, I am starting to realise that this job isn’t for me. The actual tasks, the title of the job role – yes, indeed it is something I want to do. But the environment, the company and industry just isn’t for me, and I am now looking for other options. It wasn’t a very much planned decision, I just needed to get out of my last job but do I regret taking on this new job? Absolutely not. It’s taught me new things, provided me an interesting insight into yet another industry – and improved my skills.
I am a big believer of ‘everything happens for a reason’. In a ‘every ending is a new beginning’ kind of way. Our decisions – conscious and subconscious – constantly set out our path for us -especially those subconscious ones. Whatever is happening in your life, it is meant to happen – not to punish you, to drive you insane, to make you sad – it is happening to make you stronger, for you to learn a lesson and apply learnt new things to the next chapter of your life. Don’t get ‘paralysed’ by something that didn’t happen but was meant to. Or something that didn’t exactly go to plan. Find out why it didn’t go to plan – and never make the same mistake again. You need to accept whatever is happening because you cannot undo it. You cannot re-live past, and there is no point to. Life keeps going, time keeps moving and you’ve got less and less of it to enjoy life and all it’s got to bring.
I am always just motivated with the thought that I do not want to die knowing I’ve wasted 50 years of my life, not doing what I wanted to do and just letting the world push me around. I am going to live my happy life, according to the vision I’ve got for myself – spontaneously and impulsively as I do. So far so good.
Don’t be afraid of change. It can only build you as a person, let it.